Today was just not my day. It started off with discovering a giant blowout in Cullen’s crib, and continued to go downhill from there. He fussed when he ate, he fussed when we played, and no naps lasted longer than ten minutes or so. We both cried quite a bit.
The one nice break in my day was going to my new moms group – something I had looked forward to all week long. He was distracted enough by all the voices and other babies that we were able to hang out for a bit. But as I anticipated, he eventually started to melt down again and I had to leave early. I was so frustrated.
Finally after what was literally hours and hours of crying, bouncing, rocking, swaying, and staring out the window at the grey rainy sky, Cullen exhausted himself and fell asleep for over two hours. We both needed it so badly.
Once Casey got home, I cried a bit more, telling him all about what a bad mom I am because I can’t always make my baby happy. And I found that just crying and talking about it made me feel instantly better.
So Casey took over with Cullen the Crank, and I headed downstairs with my two favorite magazines. (Still love reading Fit Pregnancy, even though I’m not anymore!)
I walked on the treadmill for almost an hour, listened to loud music and lost my thoughts in my reading. And when I opened the door to come upstairs, I was immediately greeted with the smells of someone else cooking – no better smell to a new mom!
In the living room, I discovered a delicious dinner waiting for me…
Raw kale salad with vinaigrette and sliced almonds.
And a rice bowl with black beans and onions, salsa, and avocado. Absolutely delicious.
Perhaps most importantly, a happy sleepy baby, all tucked in for the evening.
And just like that, I feel ready to face tomorrow. There is no greater gift in my life than being a mom. Even on my worst days, I feel so lucky to do this job. Here’s hoping for a happier day tomorrow!